A few weeks ago, I decided to make a major change in my life. I’m tired of being told no, and I’m tired of the person I hold closest and dearest saying I can’t be who I am. That day, I took a stand against my oppressors: the 128GB iPhone XR I’ve owned since late 2018, which had been squeezing max capacity for years, due to the endless and unforgiving lineup of male celebrities being photographed.
The person who finally pushed my poor phone over the edge was the internet’s newest quirky white boy, Logan Lerman. Previous contenders for that title have included Dylan O’Brien, Noah Centineo, and any man between the ages of 19 and 32 who can be found on your favorite streaming service’s landing page. But Lerman is different. He is an anomaly in a mass sea of milked men with patchy facial hair.
He is currently starring in the second season of Amazon.com anglers, he played a Nazi hunter (hot!). I heard he’s great at it, and it’s good for him. It’s another reason why it’s friendly material on the internet. Something about him—and him in particular—earns a spot on your camera roll.
I know what you might be thinking. “Oh, you talented and precocious entertainment critic, how many pictures can you have in your phone?” How are you 33,626? And I guarantee that by the time I’m spending to finish clicking my fingers crackling across that keyboard even when your eyes land on those words, that number will add up to the next hundred.
I don’t mean it the way you’re thinking either. Get your mind out of the gutter! I’m being completely honest when I say I often save pictures of beautiful celebrities because I enjoy scrolling through them on the train when I’m not having a favor. Or, I will flip through them on rainy days like old magazines, and pass them on to my friends to marvel at as we all read Tiger wins in a dream. I kept a copy of Timothée Chalamet’s British book Vogue magazine cover on my coffee table for the past two months, if only because it gives me high school-level butterflies to look down from rings The Americans To see curls staring at me.
Some people collect geodes or go birdwatching. I love pretty things too! What’s stopping me from enjoying nature’s bounty from my phone’s backlit screen? I made peace with my unbreakable obsession with famous men. All my friends stay on my phone, something my real boyfriend (not a figment of my imagination) used to mock me for five years every time I complained about having to delete 10 identical Colin Farrell photos when I wanted to save my real family photo.
But every now and then, these discoveries need to be shared with the public. And when Video Logan Lerman dancing to Kelis’ “Milkshake” appeared on my Instagram page, attention had to be paid. It was very nice to stay in the camera roll. But first, it should be Brought to the camera roll. With that said, I backed up my friends’ photos to the cloud and grabbed a 512GB iPhone 13 Pro that I’d been putting off setting up for days. Like Ben Franklin and his little electric volleyball or Gwyneth Paltrow and his vagina candles, this find was almost too good to keep.
The video may only be eight seconds long, but it’s more than enough to venerate Lerman as the most viral netizen of our time. Something about a boy with floppy hair, who wears comfy formal clothes all the time—sweatshirt, sweatpants, socks—while dancing to Kelis feels awkward. Not to mention Jon & Vinny’s lunch bag, which lay on the table behind him. I’ve never been to L.A.’s beloved casual Italian eatery, but there is a primitive, seductive quality to a man willing to patronize a place selling warm, salted butter banana bread for $6.25.
Others seem to echo my thoughts. several People Various versions of “He’s so friendly” popped up in my notifications in response. Others appreciated Lerman who appears to lack any interest in posting a silly video of himself dancing. as one person Briefly Put it, “He was waiting for Dylan O’Brien’s crown to slip off.”
Except, there is a difference between Lerman and O’Brien. O’Brien, an alum of the MTV hit Teen Wolfhas had more success over the past two years, starring as a love interest in Taylor Swift’s short film “All Too Well” and as a third-rate character in the dark comedy Hulu this past summer, Not okay. For this movie, O’Brien whitewashed his buzz to capture the arrogant, self-righteous charm of a TikTok troll — sending ripples through the internet’s collective sexual desire. Yes, I’m sorry for how disgusting that sentence sounds. But I was there, and saw cities reduced to rubble in seconds.
But Logan Lerman is different. he Not Ubiquitous, which is what makes him the ideal candidate for cultural courtship. Lerman has the charm of a true movie star, combined with the charm dedicated to the Chalamets of the world, and the good looks befitting of an architect in a supermarket romance. This is a man back in 2012, when Tumblr made us believe the hottest thing you could possibly be was someone who dared don a peacock coat.
Lerman is the famous, mysterious and rare white boy. He’s not up for the paparazzi walking around in skinny workout shirts or doing photo ops in leather pants. He never wears a shirt. (You can’t swing an 8-foot iPhone charger without hitting a picture of a half-naked Noah Centineo. It didn’t find its way onto our phones like that. When Lerman scored the lead role in Percy Jackson In 2010, he was smart. He parlayed the failure of the YA series into a creative role in the perks of being a wallflowerand the rest was history, preserved as a gif online like fossils in amber.
This is the rare actor who clearly isn’t so craving attention and stardom that it becomes exhausting for the rest of us to witness. His roles are rare. Lerman acts when he wants to and posts sporadically on social media. So, when he blessed us all with a video of him dancing to promote the second season of anglersit felt like a gift.
This was proof that, in addition to being endlessly charismatic, he was also very self-aware. Arguably, this guy whose two steps to a milkshake is a sign that it’s okay to get a little thirsty. who are we! It’s okay for Logan Lerman—and all the others we bob from month to month—to dance our hearts out. And in our camera shots.