Wynonna Judd is still ‘healing’ 9 months after the death of Judd’s mother, Naomi

Wynonna Judd opens up about touring again after mom Naomi Judd's death.

Wynonna Judd opens up about touring again after mother Naomi Judd’s death. (photo: Getty Images for CMT)

It’s been nine months since Naomi Judd’s death and Winona Judd says she’s “still grieving”. Wynonna goes on tour, something she is initially conflicted about. The leading member of mother-daughter duo The Judds has died by suicide just weeks after the couple announced their farewell tour.

“My initial decision was no. I was going through hell, I felt like I couldn’t see anything. I was blinded by sadness. It was like trying to paint a picture with your eyes closed. How would that picture come out?” Winona explained to Vulture.

“So I went to people that I really like and trust and got advice. Those people said things like, ‘I think it’s important for you to remember that the fans are there for you.'” I think it’s important to remember that music is healing, the 58-year-old continued. I thought about it and listened to my “intuition, my body and my mind,” said the Grammy Award-winning singer.

“I can either stay stuck in this place that I’ve been, or I can get up and move. I think it’s important to dance, I think it’s important to walk, I think it’s important to speak your heart out. And I thought, well, crap,” added Winona. “That’s what I would do on tour.”

Wynonna embarked on the planned tour and recruited a host of superstars from his duo partners.

“When you’re depressed, for anyone reading this, the only thing you’re told to do is move. Move your body. Because it makes you feel better. Isn’t that simple! It’s not easy to do, because you want to stay in bed. Like now, I Walking around the room. Because it’s important to me to move and groove, as they say. So touring became my move and groove.”

Although she moves her body around the world on tour, it doesn’t stop sadness from creeping in.

“Nights are hard for me because after the show, my mom and I would sit at the front of the bus, looking at the windshield and eating popcorn. So I tend to struggle with carbs at night because of it,” Wynonna shared. “I think about the comfort of sitting with her in front of the bus. I didn’t realize then, and of course I do now, how precious that time was. I’ll be honest, there are times when I get really sad and I miss her and it’s like, ‘Wow, I’m on this bus that’s going on The highway, just as before.”

Wynonna said she is going through “withdrawal” after the performance.

“It’s quiet,” the songwriter explained. “I travel with two dogs to help me feel less lonely, that missing piece of the puzzle because it no longer exists.”

Although Naomi is not physically on stage, Wynonna honors her mother during “Love Can Build a Bridge.” A video of Naomi was shown on screen because “it was the last song they sang together,” Wynonna explained, calling it the “heaviest” part of the show. It stirs emotions during a sound check, too. Winona told a story about the time she heard her mother sing the song’s harmony on screen.

“And without missing a beat, I turned around and looked at the screen and said, Mom, I’ve lost 20 pounds. My husband started laughing, and he said, ‘This still happens. It just took me by surprise—that was such an unusual reaction. Like, Oh, there’s Mom.'” I’m a good girl, I promise. I did the chores. “I mean, that’s me for a T,” she revealed. “I live in the moment, and the moments are surprising, and sometimes they kick my ass and take my breath away. And then sometimes I start crying. And during that moment, I happen to run around and say something sarcastic, isn’t that what we do to our mothers?”

Wynonna will be coming up with the 40th anniversary of her career.

“I marvel at the highs and the lows because it’s so high and so low. My grandfather was born 10 days before my mother died. Tell me what’s going on. This is nine months after she left, and I’m still grieving, and I’m still on tour,” she marvels, crediting her fans with the its continuation. “My fans have literally wrapped me in this blanket of sheer love and adoration, and I feel so dizzy I have to sit up.”

If you or someone you know is experiencing suicidal thoughts, call 911, call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 988, 1-800-273-8255, or text HOME to the Crisis Text Line at 741741.

MORE: How Wynonna is keeping Naomi’s mom’s memory alive

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